greywing

There’s a part in Moonwalking with Einstein by Joshua Foer (on my to-read list) where he mentions how we’ve become a culture that reads extensively rather than intensively. I kind of feel this way when I open up my Kindle, see a huge list of articles I’ve sent to myself, and set off to read, sometimes just to be reading something. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, I guess, but not necessarily a good thing either.

When Readability converts articles/pages to a Kindle format, it tends to cut out handy info like when an article is published, so it’s only when I compile these link lists that I tend to find out when that article was written. Sometimes I am surprised.

( Nonfiction Links )
( LGBT stuffs )
( Aaaaand . . . Jennifer Lawrence is weird. But funny weird. )

     "You know . . . ?" she begins tentatively. Her father nods, listening. "You know how sometimes . . . you really wish that someone would just . . . be themselves? And then they are themselves, and it's, like, so disappointing?"
     Arthur nods thoughtfully. "Say more."
     "I don't know." Jesse feels tears sting the corners of her eyes and fights to suck them back in. She doesn't make eye contact with her father, looks down at her lap. "I've been doing, like, this really bad thing. I hated doing it, but I kept doing it because I also loved it. I still sort of love it, and I still sort of wish I could keep doing it, but I can't. And also I hate that I did it. I don't know."
     "You have conflicted feelings about something." Arthur offers.
     Jesse nods. "I guess."
     Arthur leans forward a little in his chair. "It's not drug use, is it, honey? I need you to tell me if this is drug use you're talking about."
     At this Jesse cracks up a little, ruefully. "No," she says. "No." But then she thinks about it a second, about how Emily took over her physically whenever they were together, filled her with desperate craving when they were apart, made her forget her principles and sell out her friends. And gave her the most intense high she's ever experienced. In some ways, yeah, Emily Miller is a drug. And Jesse just went off her, cold turkey. No wonder she feels so hung over. "Don't worry, Dad, okay? I would totally tell you if I was doing drugs."

- Madeleine George, The Difference Between You and Me, p. 192-93

I’ve heard it said that people sometimes just happen to choose or stumble across the right book at the right time in their lives to read, or that sometimes returning to a book after having experienced more made a book have (more) sense and (more) power. The Difference Between You and Me by Madeleine George is kind of the former for me; if I had read it three years ago, I’m not sure I would have thought much about it. Because here’s the thing about my reading The Difference Between You and Me (discovered through AfterEllen, naturally, and borrowed from the handy-dandy local library--it has a bright yellow cover you can't miss, unless you misremember and look for a bright orange cover): I’m not sure I connect or particularly like any of the three protagonists. Each hits just enough at the ends of an extreme on a spectrum--Jesse is just this side of radical; Emily is just this side of trying to be the epitome of (ambitiously, almost willfully ignorantly) normal, Esther floats about in a bubble outside all boundaries--that I’m not sure I feel these characters. There are models here I do enjoy: Jesse’s parents are a joy of radical openness, especially contrasted with the stark picture we see of Esther’s family life or the bare mentions we get of Emily’s family (a much more classic upper middle class nuclear family model, I’d say). But, as is typical of the feeling I get when reading YA fiction, much of the narrative doesn’t feel padded out. This is like a bread and butter meal whereas something like A.S. Byatt would be too much meat and potatoes and foei gras for you to sink your teeth into.

I do, however, feel like I get the conflicts between them--that is, the one between Jesse and Emily. The extreme degree to which they are opposites isn’t what makes me pause; it’s that George gets what it is to have a powerful attraction that on the basis of logic seems to make no sense to you--so much so that it defies and undermines not only your reason, but your sense of dignity and pride, your sense of ethics and principles, those very things that you thought made you, you. It’s a heart vs. mind war and both sides are fighting a losing battle when they can’t be reconciled.

It’s bittersweet for me to read. ( I realize I never write a proper review. So this is not a review so much as a stream of thoughts on the book. AND SPOILERS. SO MANY SPOILERS. )

In the end, I wouldn’t say that The Difference Between You and Me is an engrossing read. It’s an easy one. I didn’t love it in the same way that I instantly loved Ash and A Love Story Starring My Dead Best Friend. Yet just now I said a whole lot more about the novel than I thought I had to say and I didn’t even touch upon third protagonist (wheel?) Esther (I do sort of love her obsession with Joan of Arc, though, and it has made me curious to get to know Joan of Arc a bit better).

I think for me Difference ended up being more of a surprise read in terms of seeing unexpected parts of myself reflected back at me. If this feels different from other lesbian YA novels I’ve read, it’s that it’s not romantic. When I think back on it, there’s a lack of really grand gestures of love or a certain amount of sappiness. It’s lustful and it’s refreshing in that regard. That said, I feel on the fence about acquiring it to add to my personal library. I don’t think it’s a book I would push hard for anyone to read, but I think it’s an interesting read. It may have more of an agenda than people may be comfortable with--it opens with a manifesto for the National Organization to Liberate All Weirdos (NOLAW)--but this shift in focus--the disparity between social views and essentially the modes of making life choices--is the lens the novel uses to examine the compatibility here.

Hrm.

Have a cow duck. Or rather Cow Duck. Because that's how I know 'im and recognize 'im. Or her? I'll never know.

(Does this mean that Google won't embed my albums anymore? >( And why is G+ so hideous now?)

( Read: Nonfiction Roundup )
( Watch: Prix de Lausanne )

In other news: Diablo III finally comes out . . . and I have no machine capable of playing it. :( Though I'm not sure I'd want to play it without my brother.

I am coming to understand the frustration of reading non-fiction. That whereas in fiction we expect, even demand, that loose ends be tied, that motivations be given, that all events have some sort of causality no matter how thinly constructed, that those characters we think deserve punishment are punished and those we hope to see rewarded find some sort of acceptable conclusion, reality and thus journalism feel no need to conform to that need to have answers, resolution, justice, logic, and all the things that neatly wrap up a narrative.

It is understanding this that should circumvent feeling betrayed by an inconclusive sketch, by stories that have no endings or endings that are infuriating, depressing, and then enraging all over again. But it doesn't, no matter how I (misguidedly) feel that these longer news pieces should somehow negate the ire that breaking news can set to festering in me.

But I'm also stumbling over that fascination of the unanswered, the so-strange-it-can't-be-made-up, the unexpected and the contrary-to-all-expectations that nonfiction has to offer.

I guess I won't be finishing the Harry Potter series any time soon . . .

( Will a depressing story a day keep all hope away? )

Thinking how a year ago this time I was in Asia makes me wistful to be traveling again. However, since I'll not be traveling in the foreseeable future . . . take me somewhere?

Tell me about where you live. Describe what it looks like: rural, urban? (Heck, show me some pics!) Where do you go and what do you? Are there nearby cities or locations--parks or beaches or mountains--that you (would) visit? Where would you take visiting guests and friends? What are the touristy things to do? What are the non-touristy things you'd want someone to see? Where and what would you eat? Are there activities you've thought about doing but need an excuse (i.e. a visiting person) to do?

I have turned off IP logging, so if you feel better commenting anonymously, please do!

Been reading lots of articles linked on Longform. I've parsed quite a number of the 50 most read stories of Year 2 and a smattering of others with tag lines that caught my eye. Here are some of the ones that really stuck out to me [article tag lines lifted from Longform]:

Paper Tigers [Essays and Criticism]
Wesley Yang • New York
What becomes of Asian-American overachievers after the test-taking ends?

The researcher was talking about what some refer to as the “Bamboo Ceiling”—an invisible barrier that maintains a pyramidal racial structure throughout corporate America, with lots of Asians at junior levels, quite a few in middle management, and virtually none in the higher reaches of leadership.

--I wasn't sure I wanted to read this, but I'm glad I did. It makes terrible, awful sense.

( I can't decide if the 'Send to Kindle' feature is a good thing or a bad thing. )

I'm probably forgetting some that I really liked. I enjoy reading most articles I find through Longform and find myself thinking how much stranger life really is than fiction. But there's really just way too much to read.

Dammit, Netflix, how did you suck me into watching an Australian teen drama about students at a dance academy?

Gdi, this is exactly why I got sucked into Dance Academy. Not because it's a good drama per se (it's your usual teen drama fare complete with the usual tropes, cliches, and occasional nonsensical convention)--or because everyone has accents--but because all the actors are actually trained dancers. I love that the show put its actors through a five-week Ballet Bootcamp for its second season because it shows its dedication to bringing quality dance reality to the production. Including all the feet abuse, ugh. (And though I haven't gotten to second season yet, I've skimmed episodes and I have to say that the series 2 opening clips are way more impressive in terms of the dancing spots we see. I do think the actors are noticeably fitter, too, so I'm glad for that. Plus, since they're using real dancers, all the body types are right. Flat chested ballerinas? Rocked out bodies? Totally on point. Wait a second, I feel like a show like this would be aimed primarily at girls, but this type of fanservice seems skewed to the male viewer?? XD)

Watching the actors here, I wonder how hard it is for them to purposefully dance badly. In series 1, they're only first years and Abigail is terrible at hip hop ("You're too stiff!" "Because I'm a ballet dancer."), but here her actress (Dena Kaplan) is rocking it! It's hard to believe that Tara is supposed to be better than Abigail when Tara's actress (Xenia Goodwin) the most awkward of the actors at hip hop in the bootcamp. XDDD

I love the dance elements of this show. It's primarily ballet, yet watching them still makes me want to get up and dance and twirl. XD It's that freedom of movement and physical self-command that always sweeps me away and ignites my envy and talent kink. I also really like that it focuses on both girls and boys at the academy, that you get to really see how ridiculously fit men who dance ballet have to be.

I also really enjoy the Tara-Kat-Sammy friendship trio (two girls and a guy combo?! no sexual tension?! shocking!) and it's nice to see that camaraderie extend to the whole cast off screen. I know that relationship dynamics in the show will evolve thanks to my episode skimming; I may have smiled a bit too widely when I caught Abigail threatening someone on Tara's behalf (say what now?--the enemy of my enemy is my friend? XD).

Yet even I am surprised to find myself hitting the "Play episode" button over and over again. XD Admittedly things with "dance" in the title usually catch my eye on Netflix, but they're usually pretty terrible. Dance Academy was surprisingly not dreck, though I could do without some of the petty antics in order to just get more dance-related drama. (Though I guess in Abigail's case, a lot of her petty actions derive from a sense of inferiority.) A lot of the relationship drama is predictable, so my brain sort of shuts off when all the love drama is going down. But then Ms. Raine starts tearing into a poor student and it's all, "That's what you get for thinking about that boy/girl during class!" XD

There is one thing that throws me off: The Asian Australian extras in the background. I don't know why, I told nemesisjk8, since I've even met an Asian Australian family, but it still throws me off to see them! My brain always goes, "Asian! In the background!" Ahahaha, I have no idea why. XD

Anyway, I'mma go watch all these BTS clips now, k?

Wow, would being in this show count as having a hazardous job?

The Bravest Woman in Seattle

Unmasking Horror -- A special report.; Japan Confronting Gruesome War Atrocity:

The research was kept secret after the end of the war in part because the United States Army granted immunity from war crimes prosecution to the doctors in exchange for their data. Japanese and American documents show that the United States helped cover up the human experimentation. Instead of putting the ringleaders on trial, it gave them stipends.

[..]

Partly because the Americans helped cover up the biological warfare program in exchange for its data, Gen. Shiro Ishii, the head of Unit 731, was allowed to live peacefully until his death from throat cancer in 1959. Those around him in Unit 731 saw their careers flourish in the postwar period, rising to positions that included Governor of Tokyo, president of the Japan Medical Association and head of the Japan Olympic Committee.

via Longform's 50 most read stories [year two]

So today I have spent my time reading about rape (more eviscerating than Alice Sebold's Lucky), war atrocities committed in the name of science and biological weapons, hackers using your webcams to spy on you (put stickers over your webcams, peoples, and make sure your laptop is off and not pointed at intimate places like your bed--and stop taking your laptops into the bathroom with you!), the people who jumped from the Twin Towers on 9/11, skimmed this story about a porn starlet, and marveled a few days ago about the ballsy move of making profit off of facilitating infidelity.

Can I climb back into my bubble? D: D: D:

Episode 4: The Voice in the Night:

Wha--? Who? Why? I mean . . . what? I get where the plot is going and I'm glad to see that Korra is getting cut down now in order to be built up as someone stronger and wiser, but . . . what was that she saw just at the end of the episode?

In other news, I like Asami Sato. But, as whoaheyyou's help pointed out, how could I not like a character whose character design was based on Lust (FMA)? I loved me some Lust. Like a lot a lot. Like my favorite Sin a lot. Like I wouldn't have minded a Lust!Hawkeye a lot (a combo of two of my favorite things?! Ah, FMA, how nostalgic . . . but more on nostalgia later). And while developments do feel on fast forward at times with the plot pacing, I don't mind her with Mako. I think they look cute together actually. He totally looks like the type of pretty boy that a good looking rich girl would have hanging off her arm. You know, a boytoy.

. . . If we're really going to have a Mako/Korra romance, can we just make it an OT3? 'Cause two women who take charge and get what they want in a relationship--ok, put that way, they'd just clash all the time but maybe not?! XD I mean, c'mon Asami, if you feel safe with Mako, imagine how much safer you'd feel with the Avatar who can kick the asses of anyone who threatens you with four elements rather than just one!

4 episodes in is a bit early to be gauging if I'll be watching a series to its completion, but every episode so far has left me wanting to see more. I like how they've made Amon a true threat, not only ideologically but just outright threatening to the very fabric of what holds up society, a force that can obliterate inherent differences that have created power structures of inequality. ( Read more... )

Now enjoy this fanart WHY linked me to. (Though I must say that the first thing I thought was: That's totally the state of affairs for Yoko [12 Kingdoms]!)

In other enjoyment of media news: I've been having some severe anime nostalgia thanks to TV Tropes leading me to the Bubblegum Crisis page, which led me to Shadowjack's recaps of the episodes, which contained discussions that led me to discover that fanfic authors I grew up reading (John Biles!, Chris Davies!, Jeanne Hedge!) still exist on the Internet . . . and interact on forums (I've never known these names outside of the fanfic they've written), which obviously led me to first rewatch parts of BGC (and reread some fanfic XD) and then move onto Shadowjack's recaps of the Sailor Moon anime, which really just means I have been sucked into a vortex of memories about growing up in the 90s.

Nostalgia~~

Completely unrelated ETA: Penguins!